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March 26, 2004

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TU balances parent involvement

The older my own children get, the more important I think it is for universities to work closely with parents. Or maybe I just relate better to parents now that many of them are my age.

The University has had a long tradition of involving parents, primarily through the long-standing Parents’ Orientation summer program. That program has produced strong connections that have paid reciprocal dividends between parents and staff for years.

But a summer program that includes only a quarter of the parents only goes so far.

Several years back we started hearing complaints that the only time parents heard from us was when we sent the bill. (It’s not a small bill at that.) The result was the formation of a parent relations committee, chaired by Pete Neville, director of Coates Center and Student Activities, which outlined a program that would enhance communication between the University and parents.

The outcome: a Fall Family Weekend, parent Web page, parent handbook, the Parent Advisory Council and the ParentTalk listserv.

How much parent contact is the right amount? Long ago there was an expectation that universities would act in place of parents: in loco parentis. That changed in the seventies when students demanded to be treated as adults – in part because young people then were being sent to war in Vietnam as adults. Universities obliged, and in loco parentis was dead.

Over the last decade, parents have made a comeback as universities have learned to work in partnership with parents. Part of this is a direct result of how much an education costs – parents have high expectations for what they pay.

Universities, however, must take care not to allow parents to manage the education of their child. It is essential that students learn to seek help, make their own decisions, express their own complaints and fix their own problems. The University sends this message by releasing grades to students and not parents.

Many of my colleagues at other institutions bemoan the amount of time they spend dealing with parents. (Most think we are giving parents too much of a voice by sponsoring ParentTalk.) On the contrary: Working with parents in any context is almost always positive, especially when they are expressing concern or seeking advice. The parents and the staff want the same thing – for the students to succeed.

Over the last decade, parents have made a comeback as universities have learned to work in partnership with parents. Part of this is a direct result of how much an education costs – parents have high expectations for what they pay.

Some students object to the importance Trinity places on parents. The Student Court heard a small, passionate outcry from students when the parental notification practice was put in place this year for second-offense alcohol violations. Students want to be treated as adults, and yet we field an awful lot of calls from parents on their behalf.

But we don’t mind. Often students haven’t yet learned the best ways to advocate for themselves, and a little help can go a long way. Parents want to tell us, too, when they think we need to help a struggling student.

It has taken awhile, but parent-staff contact has achieved an appropriate balance. The University has learned this, as have most of our students: Parents matter.

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