The picture above was sent by Paula. It should be entitled "The Early Years of the Smuthers Brothers" --- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_rRxs8p8Is0

Remember how Tommy always complained that “Mom liked you best” --- http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0061296/quotes

I tried to imagine some of the things the poor little guy in the picture above must've done to be in such a feeding predicament:

• He peeked when mom was in the bird bath

• He's two years older than his sister and won't leave home

• This is mom's notice that his quest for tenure has been denied

• Mom's handing out merit raises among the tenured birds

• When she returned with food, he was the designated "rooster." (Get it! She roosts on him.)

• Mom needs more "wind beneath her wings" (and never brings him Beano)

• Mom's trying to scare (read that push) out the little guy's problem with constipation

• Mom's teaching him to expect a little "rain" to fall in life

• Having come from the biggest egg in the nest, he's always remembered as a huge pain in the tail

• Yesterday he bragged too much about how "Mom was always bugging him."

• He ceaselessly complains about the menu and wants more choices

• He demands a higher priced Monteux Orange Flower Water with each meal

• He called his mom an old crow

• He called their home a cuckoo's nest

• He repeatedly fouls the center of the nest rather than hanging over the edge

• He irritates mom by constantly singing "Poor Little Robin" --- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Walkin%27_to_Missouri

• His Ritalin has not yet kicked in

• He always wants to take the limb less traveled (You know! The wobbly one.)

• When he came to a fork in the limb he just flipped

• All he ever dreams about is soaring like an eagle

• He made fun of mom's new fat and lazy boyfriend --- the sparrow with the beer gut.
  
  
   

• He keeps asking questions with no known answers like:  "Who's my dad?"

• He wormed his way through his sister's last meal

• Mom's still working on his problem with head lice

• He's always sneaking off to feather somebody else's nest

• He joined PETA and no longer will eat bugs or worms

• He's on a hunger strike until mom brings tofu

• He's failed to publish a single research paper in The Bird Accounting Review

• He picked the nest apart, forcing the family to live on the lamb (errr ... limb)

• He's the one who recommended their nest's sub-prime mortgage that got foreclosed

• He's thinking of enlisting in the "Air" Force to fight those ransom-carrying homing pigeons in Iraq

• On his training flights he repeatedly bombs a nice widow's new car (that old woman who fills her bird feeder 365 times a year)

• He doesn't see anything funny about the Windex TV advertisement where people bang into glass doors

• He calls his sister his "significant other."

• He got caught hiding chickie photos under his feathers

• Others? __________